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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28890576">us against the world</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/tokyowriter/pseuds/tokyowriter'>tokyowriter</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>TWICE (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Actress Nayeon, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Mentioned TWICE Ensemble, Toxic Relationship, college students minayeon, med student mina</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:02:16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>16,545</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28890576</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/tokyowriter/pseuds/tokyowriter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Mina dreams to become a doctor and Nayeon drops out of law school to get a big break as an aspiring actress. And when the harsh reality of life gets in the way of their dreams, they lost each other along the way.</p><p>Twitter tag: #MinayeonAgainstTheWorld</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Im Nayeon/Myoui Mina</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>53</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>us against the world</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>to the people who motivated me in writing, thank you. this fic wouldn’t be possible without you! b &amp; m<br/>this is my first minayeon fic so please bear with me. please prepare yourself for the long chapters ahead :)<br/>note: horizontal line denotes the start and end of a flashback :)</p><p>i wrote chapter one while listening to these songs. i hope you will find these songs fitting to the story!<br/>-	fallingforyou by the 1975<br/>-	apocalypse by cigarettes after sex<br/>-	sanctuary by joji<br/>-	13 by lany<br/>-	snowman by sia</p><p>so many things will happen so let’s enjoy the ride :D<br/>i hope you will enjoy! </p><p>twitter: @thetokyowriter<br/>Twitter tag: #MinayeonAgainstTheWorld<br/>tokyo xx</p>
    </blockquote><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Mina remembered that Nayeon was the certainty she needed in her life.<br/>But Mina forgot that Nayeon was also life itself, a daring and unpredictable adventure.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The taxi driver needed to inform her twice that they already reached her place. Mina’s mind was too preoccupied because of the events that happened for the past months.</p><p>Mina mumbled an apology for taking too long, paid the taxi driver and then, stepped out of the vehicle. She checked her phone, seeing it’s already past 1AM and didn’t mind the faint aching in her heart when she caught a glimpse of her lock screen.</p><p>She walked towards their apartment complex and was greeted by the guard with a polite smile. Mina replies with a nod and proceeded to walked in the lobby. But before she could enter the elevator, the receptionist in the lobby called her.</p><p>Mina halted her steps, turning around. “Yes…” A pause, she’s so stressed out right now that she couldn’t even remember her name. “...Ms. Choi?</p><p>Ms. Choi gave her an envelope and Mina wasn’t dumb to figure out what’s inside. “Mr. Ahn wants me to give it to you directly.”</p><p>Mina’s shoulders went slump, she didn’t know where to get the money to pay for their 5-month rent. She just borrowed money from Sana for their electricity bill earlier.</p><p>She knew that if she can’t pay for their rent, they need to pack their things and leave their apartment.</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Mina.”</p><p>Mina gave her a half-hearted smile, there’s no reason for Ms. Choi to apologize. “It’s okay. I’ll tell Nayeon about it.”</p><p>The receptionist nodded, her eyes following Mina who was walking towards the elevator, worried.</p><p>Her mind went back to reality when she heard the elevator dings, she didn’t notice that she already reached her floor.</p><p>When she entered their unit, Mina took off her shoes and cleanly lined it up on their shoe rack. In their 4 years of relationship, Mina learned that Nayeon always left her shoes in the entry way and her girlfriend wasn’t bothered of the mess she left behind.</p><p>She immediately turned on the light switch when she was done. Confused, she flipped it again but darkness was still invading the room. Mina massaged her temple, she just paid for their electricity bill earlier but maybe, it was overdue. Mina opened the side drawer and started to lit up a candle. They need to suffer just for the night.</p><p>Mina held the candle holder and looked around the house. She could already feel the tiredness, just like it has been for a year.</p><p>Cans of beer were on the coffee table, clothes were scattered on the floor, the dishes from the morning were still in the sink and her girlfriend was nowhere to be found.</p><p>A mess.</p><p>Mina put down her things on the dining table and proceeded to clean the sink, the candle sitting at the top of the kitchen counter.</p><p>When she’s done, she opened the fridge to grab something to eat. She remembered that she skipped dinner and had to take an overtime due to the load of customers earlier at the café. Her blood boils because of the lack of food inside. Not even a left-over food.</p><p>
  <em>Jesus.</em>
</p><p>Mina groaned and closed the fridge door roughly. She pulled a chair and sat down, her hand on the side of her head. It’s been almost a year that she’s always coming home to a house like this.</p><p>Mina breathed deeply and tried to calm herself down. She looked at her books and saw how dirty it was because of what happened yesterday. Mina opened one of her books and tried to read, distracting herself from her thoughts.</p><p>Silence was lingering around the room. It felt like no one was inside the house.</p><p>Mina was used to it anyway.</p><p>She was busy reading the post-it notes on her book when she noticed tears falling down. Mina sniffed and used her sleeve to wiped away her tears. She didn’t notice that she’s already crying.</p><p>
  <em>Fighting, Dr. Myoui! You can do it!</em>
</p><p>Another post-it but this time, it’s not her handwriting.</p><p>It was Nayeon’s.</p><p>Mina ran her fingertips along the note.</p><p>
  <em>Where did we go wrong?</em>
</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Mina remembers how stupidly beautiful Nayeon was.</p><p>It was weekend and Mina decided to spend her time with Sana, one of her best friends. Since their parents were in Japan, they always spend their weekends at the university. Most of the time, you can find them at the library, burying their faces in their anatomy books.</p><p>Soccer players were training in the field and on the other side, there were also a few students who were playing amidst the scorching heat of the sun.</p><p>They were sitting on the bleachers, under the big oak tree that covered them from the rays of the sun. Sana was so sick of the library and she wanted to tell Mina stories about her professor that likes to humiliate her without lowering her voice.</p><p>“I swear to god, my professor is testing me!” Sana complained and Mina chuckled, she found it cute when her friends are complaining because of medical school. “It’s only one time when I forgot the answer in her question! Now, she treats me like I won’t survive her class.” She threw her fist in the air, a determined look on her face. “I will top her class, I swear! Watch me, Professor Kang! Watch me!”</p><p>Mina laughed, standing up from her seat, while Sana followed her. “That’s the spirit!” Sana clung to her arm and they started to walk towards the side of the field. “And I’m happy that you and Momo are with me. Someone can already teach me the mysteries of chemistry!”</p><p>Mina was about to scold her best friend for invalidating her skills <em>again</em> when suddenly, a ball landed straight to her face. She heard Sana’s piercing scream when she fell down. She didn’t care, her face hurts like a <em>bitch</em>.</p><p>Mina guessed it’ll leave a mark.</p><p>“Oh my god! Are you okay?”</p><p>“Of course, she’s not! You and your friends literally hit her on the face with a soccer ball!” Sana yelled to the girl who ran towards them. Mina remembered how scary Sana was when she’s angry but she didn’t have time to calm her friend.</p><p>Mina groaned, ignoring the girls circling around her and focused on massaging the bridge of her nose. She hoped she won’t get a broken one.</p><p>“Did I kill her?!” She caught a glimpse of a black-haired girl sitting beside her. Mina guessed that her friend, the blonde short-haired girl, was the one who asked her earlier. “I can’t control the ball and I kicked it way too far. Oh my gosh! I didn’t mean to! I’m so sorry! Are you okay?”</p><p>“N-no. I-I’m fine…”</p><p>But when Mina looked at the girl with bunny-like teeth, she looked stunned.</p><p>The girl cleared her throat. “Y-your nose…” She stuttered, pointing at her own nose.</p><p>Mina frowned but felt the blood flowing out of her nose. “Shit.” She cursed, seeing the blood at her fingers after touching it.</p><p>“Here,” The girl who kicked the ball offered her a handkerchief. “for your nose.”</p><p>Mina accepted it, the handkerchief has a letter <strong>‘INY’</strong> sewed at the bottom, and wiped the blood on her nose. “T-thank you,” She mumbled.</p><p>“Look what you’ve done!” Sana helped her to stand up, sending the girls a death glare. “Let’s go, Mina! I’ll bring you to the university’s hospital!”</p><p>“W-wait!” They stopped and Mina can see how scared the girls were because of Sana. “I’ll come with you. I feel guilty…” The girl was about to grab her arm when she realized that they didn’t know each other. “C-can you walk?”</p><p>“I can manage…” Mina replied, she just couldn’t bear the pain of her nose. “No need to come with us. We—”</p><p>“Let me help you,” The girl insisted and smiled, “I’ll help your friend support you on the way to the hospital. It’s not that far.”</p><p>Mina could only nod but it only made her dizzy.</p><p>
  <em>Fuck.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Im Nayeon was persistent.</p><p>Mina told her that everything was okay after a week. It left her a small bruise but it’s slowly getting better now. But Nayeon wasn’t convinced so she was doing anything just to make it up to her.</p><p>Nayeon was always making sure she’s getting better by hanging out with her and that’s why Mina learned more about the girl after a week.</p><p>Im Nayeon. A twenty-one years old law student who was attending the same university, specifically a year older than her. In her first year of law and Mina heard that the girl is one of the top students in her batch.</p><p>Meeting Nayeon was unexpected, just like the ball that landed on her face.</p><p>How ironic.</p><p>“Do you want to grab lunch later? My treat!” Nayeon asked when she found Mina reading in the library.</p><p>Mina shook her head and tried her best to politely reject her, “Me and my friends are having a lunch later.” She said and then, continue to read.</p><p>Mina knew Nayeon was pouting, a habit whenever Mina rejected her requests. And probably because she really wanted to have lunch with Mina. It’s not that she didn’t want to have lunch with Nayeon, she already promised Sana and Momo that they will have lunch together.</p><p>Nayeon tilted her head and read the front cover of the book she was reading, “I hate chemistry when I was in high school.”</p><p>Mina stopped reading and looked at her across the table, “Why?”</p><p>“I don’t understand it, especially my chemistry teacher.” Nayeon rested her chin on her palm, still looking at the chemistry book Mina was reading. “Mendeleev created the Periodic Table of Elements, right?” Mina slowly nodded but she was also confused that Nayeon was talking about Mendeleev. “Only for the students to memorize every single element in the table! What’s the use of it if we would just memorize it? Mendeleev didn’t create shit for nothing!” Nayeon complained and Mina could see that she was serious about her complaint.</p><p>And because Nayeon’s voice went a little louder, some students spared them a glance and the librarian looked mad.</p><p>The librarian looked at them, “Shh!” She scolded, her face scrunching because of the lack of sleep.</p><p>Nayeon apologized to the librarian and looked back at Mina who was already giggling. “It’s for you, anyway.” Nayeon shrugged, still didn’t understand the logic of it.</p><p>“So that’s why you’re taking law?” Mina asked.</p><p>“Nope.” Nayeon pursed her lips, contemplating if she should drop it but says it anyway. “My parents wanted me to take it.”</p><p>Mina looked intently at the girl in front of her, curious. “So, what is it that you want?”</p><p>Nayeon smirked, her eyes gleaming. “For you to have lunch with me.” She smiled even wider, her bunny teeth showing while looking cutely at her. “Please, Mina. Just this one time.”</p><p>Nayeon clasped her hands and made a pleading face that<em> no one in the world </em>could ever resist.</p><p>That’s all it took for Mina to say yes.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>It ended up with Nayeon having a lunch with Mina and her friends, Sana and Momo. Nayeon didn’t complain and it looked like she was enjoying hanging out with them. Sana and Momo introduced themselves. They were both in their first year and studying medicine, just like Mina.</p><p>They were having fun telling stories to Momo about how they met Nayeon when Nayeon’s phone rang.</p><p>“Hey, Jeong…I’m having lunch with Mina,” A pause, her eyebrows furrowing. “No, idiot! Her friends are here, too!” Nayeon looked back at the three, embarrassed because of her sudden yelling, and gave them an apologetic smile. After that, she looked around the restaurant, “You and Jihyo are here? I thought you’re still in class.” She looked back at Mina, biting her lip and looked like she’s about to say something. “Wait. I’ll ask.”</p><p>Nayeon lowered her phone, leaning closer to Mina who was sitting across the table. “My friends are here. Remember the stupid blonde girl at the field?” Mina chuckled and nodded, remembering the girl Nayeon was referring to. “She and my other friend are here and they are asking if they can join us….?” Nayeon’s voice was hesitant, testing the waters if Mina would agree.</p><p>Sana beat Mina to answer and nodded excitedly, “Of course, they can! It would be fun!” She giggled and the excitement can be seen on her face.</p><p>Nayeon smiled but before she could talk to her friend on the phone, there were two girls who sat beside her. Her face looked surprised because of the sudden entrance of the two. She looked at them and they were smiling widely at the three Japanese girls, excited.</p><p>The blonde girl looked at Nayeon, her eyebrows furrowed because Nayeon was taking too long so she nudged her arm.</p><p>Nayeon rolled her eyes because of how dumb they looked. “This is Jeongyeon and the small one is Jihyo.”</p><p>“Yah!” Jihyo protested, not liking of how Nayeon described her.</p><p>Nayeon sticked out her tongue, teasing Jihyo who was pouting beside her. Then, faced the three girls in front of her, “These are Sana, Momo and Mina. You knew Mina, right?”</p><p>Jeongyeon smirked, thinking it would be a perfect time to tease Nayeon. “Yeah, we know her because you can’t stop talking—”</p><p>Nayeon ignored her and continued introducing her friends, “And Jeong and Jihyo are also studying law.”</p><p>As if there were reading each other’s mind, Jihyo added fuel to the fire.  “I thought Nayeon is having a date—”</p><p>“Can you both shut up! We’re having lunch!” Nayeon bursted out, her cheeks reddening because of embarrassment.</p><p>They continued to tease Nayeon and Mina chuckled when she saw Nayeon being embarrassed. It was rare to see Im Nayeon, the girl who didn’t let anyone mess with her, being teased by her best friends.</p><p>Sana and Momo exchanged glances while eating. As if talking with their eyes, they noticed how Mina laughed and looked<em> differently </em>when it comes to Nayeon.</p><p>It looked like Mina was enjoying her time with her.</p><p>Sana and Momo knew there’s something different.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Sana and Momo were right.</p><p>Mina’s class ended minutes ago and knowing that her friends were still in class, she had nothing to do and no one to hang out with. Since her anatomy class just ended, she didn’t want to drain herself by studying <em>again</em> at the library and found herself making her way to the building of College of Law.</p><p>Mina found it weird.</p><p>She looked at her phone, thinking if she should text Nayeon but afraid that she's still in class and didn’t want to disturb her. But when she checked her contacts, she couldn’t find Nayeon’s phone number.</p><p>She hadn’t asked Nayeon’s number yet.</p><p>Of course, Mina couldn’t ask her number let alone ask Nayeon to have lunch with her. How could she when Nayeon was the only one asking her but always ended up having a lunch with their friends?</p><p>Mina sat down at a bench outside the building, waiting for Nayeon to show up. She was busy playing games in her phone when she spotted Nayeon walking out of the building. Mina stood up from her seat and was about to call her when a guy walked beside Nayeon, talking to her.</p><p>Mina clicked her tongue and thought, <em>of course she has other friends.</em> She sighed, giving up her lunch date with Nayeon and turned her back but before she could walk away, someone called her.</p><p>"Mina?"</p><p>She looked back and saw Nayeon.</p><p>
  <em>Shit.</em>
</p><p>"Are you waiting for someone?"</p><p>Mina felt like she got caught.</p><p>"I—uhm…" Mina looked down and started fiddling with her fingers, embarrassed. "I was waiting for you." She couldn't even look at Nayeon in the eyes. "But I guess you have other plans." Then, glanced at the guy not so far away from Nayeon.</p><p>Nayeon followed her gaze and looked back at her, "Oh, he was just asking about our requirement." She tilted her head, confused. "Are you waiting for me?"</p><p>Mina didn't know how to lie.</p><p>But before she could answer, Nayeon smiled.</p><p>And it's one of Mina's favorite things about her.</p><p>"Lunch?" Nayeon asked.</p><p>It felt like Nayeon could read her mind.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Their lunch dates became a routine.</p><p>Mina’s morning class usually ended early than Nayeon so she was the one who waits outside her building. She was always in her usual spot so whenever Nayeon walked out of the building, her gaze will immediately land on her.</p><p>It was worth it, seeing Nayeon’s eyes turned into crescent moons whenever their eyes meet.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina knew Nayeon was curious about her life. She always asked a lot of questions whenever they were together. And when they were having dinner after their exams, Mina didn’t have the heart to ignore her, especially when Nayeon was looking at her as if she was the most precious thing in the world.</p><p>So, she answered all of her questions. Mina told her that she moved to Korea when she was in high school and that’s where she met Sana and Momo. Even if there are a lot of prestigious universities in Japan, she preferred to study in Korea because she wanted to stay away from her parents’ eyes for a little while.</p><p>She vividly remembered how angry her parents were when she told them that she’s not taking law and instead, she’ll take a different path: medicine.</p><p>It was understandable. She came from a family of lawyers and suddenly, their youngest daughter dreams to become a doctor.</p><p>Her family’s expectations were crushed and she felt their disappointment that day but Mina didn’t let anyone destroy her dreams.</p><p>Not even her family.</p><p>They let Mina pursue her dream to become a doctor but when Mina fails a class, they will freeze her bank account and wait for her to return to Japan.</p><p>Mina thought it was <em>too</em> simple and didn’t even think that it was a challenge. She’s always the top of her class and knowing her parents’ request, she thought that it would be easy for her to study medicine.</p><p>When she’s done, Mina looked at Nayeon who was staring and listening intently at her as if she’s a professor discussing a topic.</p><p>Mina thought she’s cute.</p><p>“It’s fun, right? Doing what you wanted to do.” Nayeon uttered while playing the food using her fork on her plate.</p><p>Mina agreed, she can still remember the pure happiness she felt when her mother told her that she can study medicine.</p><p>She heard Nayeon let out a sigh, “I wonder what it feels like.” Mina was confused but then she remembered their conversation at the library.</p><p>But before she could ask, Nayeon joked, “Your parents would love me. I’m studying law.”</p><p>Mina stared at Nayeon, who has a ketchup on the side of her lips. “They will,” She whispered.</p><p>She remembered how much she likes ketchup.</p><p>Then, Mina’s gaze landed to her lips but she immediately looked away, afraid that Nayeon will catch her staring.</p><p>Mina wondered how it would be like to kiss Nayeon.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Friends, Season 5, Episode 16, 11:25.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>huh????</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Never mind </em>
</p><p>
  <em>See you tomorrow, Nayeon</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Mina put down her phone after sending the last message. She continued to read because she has a long test tomorrow.</p><p>She remembered her failed attempt in flirting and she couldn’t help but to laugh.</p><p><em>Of course, she wouldn’t get that</em>.</p><p>Mina laughed at herself again.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>They were hanging out at Nayeon, Jeongyeon and Jihyo’s shared apartment one afternoon. It was Tuesday and both of them didn’t have a morning class. Nayeon’s room was clean but when Mina saw Nayeon’s law textbooks on the shelves, she almost asked Nayeon if she could arrange them alphabetically. She stopped herself before saying something embarrassing.</p><p>Mina’s eyes lingered around the room, fascinated at Nayeon’s bunny stuff toys on the top of her shelves and a bunch of movie posters taped on the wall. Most of it are English movies Mina was familiar with.</p><p>While Nayeon was studying at her desk and letting Mina walked around her room, Mina decided to lie down at her bed, she smiled when she saw Nayeon’s glow-in-the-dark stars that were attached to her ceiling.</p><p>Mina found the silence comforting and then suddenly, Nayeon dropped a bomb that no one expected.</p><p>“Mina,” Nayeon called out, her eyes still fixated at what she was writing. Mina sat up, waiting for Nayeon to speak. “I can’t do it.” Nayeon said in a soft tone.</p><p>If Mina wasn’t paying attention, she wouldn’t hear her but her words were clear.</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>Nayeon looked at her, her eyes filled with tears that caught Mina off guard. Her body automatically stood up, walking towards the girl and wipping away her tears. “I can’t do it anymore.”</p><p>“You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to.” Mina’s soft voice comforted her.</p><p>Nayeon shook her head, her tears flowing down her cheeks. “It’s not that easy…”</p><p>“Even though it’s not easy,” Mina lowered her head, leveling her eyes with Nayeon. “I’m here.”</p><p>Nayeon’s tears kept falling down on her cheeks and Mina knew she was in trouble the moment she looked at Nayeon’s eyes.</p><p>Because Nayeon looked <em>so</em> <em>pretty</em> even when she was crying.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“And that’s all for today. See you next week.” The professor bid the class goodbye.</p><p>Mina leaned against the backrest of her seat, exhausted. It was her last class for the week and she’s dying to have an 8-hour sleep or more. She couldn’t remember when was the last time she had a nice long sleep because of her loaded requirements.</p><p>She placed her stuff inside her bag, didn’t realize that she’s the only one left inside, and proceeded to leave the lecture room.</p><p>When Mina reached the lobby of the building, she found Nayeon reading, her law textbooks scattered on the table.</p><p>“Are you studying here?”</p><p>Nayeon almost jumped from her seat, looking back at her. “Jesus!” Her hand immediately landed on her chest, surprised. “Stop scaring me!” Nayeon breathed deeply, calming herself. And then, replied, “Yeah, I have a long test next week and I wanted to be productive while waiting for you.”</p><p>“Waiting for me?” Mina was confused. “Why?”</p><p>Nayeon closed the textbook she was reading and stood up, facing Mina. “There is a new restaurant nearby! And I’m craving for chicken!” She took a look at her watch, “It’s a perfect time for dinner, too! Let’s go?”</p><p>Nayeon waited for her reply and all Mina could answer was a giggle, “You could’ve just texted me.”</p><p>“But I just passed by the restaurant while you’re in class. I didn’t want to disturb you and your medicine brain.”</p><p>Mina laughed and helped Nayeon with her books. They went out of the building and walked towards the restaurant Nayeon was talking about.</p><p>“Today is their opening day! I think they have a promo!”</p><p>Mina stared at the girl beside her, skipping as if she’s going to an amusement park. It was amusing how Nayeon treated the smallest things as if it’s one of the most precious things in the world.</p><p>That made Mina wanted to know Nayeon more.</p><p>They entered the restaurant and it was packed. It was expected since it’s the restaurant’s opening day. Most of the students from their university were eating their dinner at the newly opened restaurant. Mina felt her hands started to shake nervously because of the amount of people inside. She tried to calm herself by holding her hand down but it was no use. She was busy looking around when she felt a warm hand hold hers.</p><p>Mina looked down at their hands, “We can eat outside.” She stared back at Nayeon who was smiling at her, reassuring her. “Just wait for me outside and let me order us some food. Is that okay?”</p><p>Mina nodded and she was about to say something when Nayeon started to walk towards the counter. Mina sighed, she let Nayeon pay her food that easily. She went outside and breathed some fresh air. She hated crowded places and it gave her uneasy feeling so she tried to avoid them.</p><p>After a few minutes, Nayeon walked outside of the restaurant and Mina immediately gave her a hand, grabbing the take-outs.</p><p>“I’ll pay you after we eat.”</p><p>“No need.” Nayeon grabbed Mina’s arm, hugging it. “The fact that you’ll be eating dinner with me is enough, Dr. Myoui.”</p><p>Mina chuckled, liking the new nickname. “Is that what you’ll call me, Attorney Im?”</p><p>Nayeon just gave her a soft smile.</p><p>They sat at the bench nearby, facing each other. It’s not much space but they didn’t mind.</p><p>“Jeong and Jihyo are so stupid, you know?” Nayeon laughed while starting to share how dumb her friends were, “Those two acts like a married couple but can’t even admit that they love each other.”</p><p>Mina gasped, surprised. “Really? I knew it! I sensed it when we had lunch. It was so obvious!”</p><p>“How can you sense it that fast but neither of them can’t? That’s stupidity, I swear!”</p><p>“I think they are afraid to admit it to themselves.” Mina wiped a napkin on the side of her lips, “With Sana and Momo, they already act like a couple. They just didn’t put a label to it.”</p><p>“I thought they’re already a couple?”</p><p>“Not really. They were friends since they were kids. Those two were inseparable!”</p><p>“But do you think they will be a couple?”</p><p>“If I knock some sense to them, yes.”</p><p>Nayeon snorted, “I bet they will realize it soon. Jeongyeon and Jihyo, too.”</p><p>They continued to eat while telling stories about their friends until Nayeon started to share about herself.</p><p>Nayeon told her that she dated once in high school. Kim Jisoo, same age with them and currently a trainee. The girl heard that she will have her debut role soon. Mina saw how happy Nayeon was for her ex-girlfriend because she already found her happiness and pursuing her dream.</p><p>Mina hummed but she was still curious so she pushed the buttons, “Why did you break up?”</p><p>Nayeon gave her a smile but it didn’t reach her eyes.</p><p>“Maybe, I thought that it was too much for me.” Nayeon laughed because of how dumb it sounds. “Her love scared me. It was too much. Jisoo is full of love and I was scared I couldn’t give the same amount of love to her. That’s why I decided to end things between us.”</p><p> “You’ll never be not enough for the right person, Nayeon.”</p><p>Nayeon shrugged, “I guess so.” A pause. “It’s scary, you know? If the one you love doesn’t accept you for who you are.” Nayeon chuckled but her eyes weren’t bright as before.</p><p>Mina stayed quiet. Nayeon’s words were still sinking in and after that, silence enveloped the two. When they finished their food, Nayeon decided to go home and told Mina she needed time to sleep. Mina offered to walk with her towards her apartment.</p><p>When they reached Nayeon’s apartment unit, Nayeon turned around and faced Mina, “Same time next week? Lunch?”</p><p>Mina nodded, “And dinner.” She added.</p><p>Nayeon’s smile was priceless. Mina thought no one in the world has the prettiest smile except Nayeon.</p><p>“Great.” She smiled, wider than before. “Nice meeting you, Dr. Myoui.”</p><p>“You too—”</p><p>Nayeon knew what Mina was about to say and she stopped her, “No need to call me Attorney.”</p><p>Mina frowned, didn’t understand why Nayeon was telling her that. “Why?” She asked.</p><p>“I’ll tell you soon.”</p><p>The next thing Nayeon did caught Mina off guard, like the ball that Nayeon kicked months ago. But this time, it wasn’t painful. It was magical because she felt soft lips pressed against her cheek that leave her speechless.</p><p>When Nayeon met her eyes, Mina knew she’s also surprised but smiled at her anyway.</p><p>“Thank you,” Nayeon’s hand were still on her shoulder, “for spending time with me.”</p><p>Mina blinked, surprised. Then, replied, “Anytime.” She could feel the creeping hotness on her cheeks.</p><p>Nayeon just smiled back at her before she closed the door. Mina started walking down the hallway and she almost trip. Good thing she regained her balance.</p><p>Fuck.</p><p>It’s just a kiss on the cheek.</p><p>But it’s from Nayeon.</p><p>Mina almost trips again.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>When Mina was preparing for bed that night, she got a text message.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>i think you need to have a lawyer</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Why?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>because you’re stealing something</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>I’m not stealing anything, Nayeon</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>if you say so :D</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>never mind. goodnight mina :)</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Goodnight, Nayeon</em>
</p><p>
  <em>:)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Mina couldn’t sleep that night.</p><p>She wondered why.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina thought it’s the start of something new.</p><p>But she had no idea that it’s the calm before the storm.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>After that night, something changed.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Goodmorning, Nayeonnie</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Momo told me there’s a pork belly restaurant two blocks away from our university</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I wonder if you want to eat lunch with me?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My treat!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I guess you’re still in class</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Text me if you wanna come</em>
</p><p>
  <em>:)</em>
</p><p> </p><p>But Nayeon didn’t.</p><p>That day, Mina waited outside Nayeon’s college building until her lunch break was over. She didn’t even feel the hunger because she was busy thinking of Nayeon.</p><p><em>Maybe, she has something important to do.</em> Mina thought before attending her afternoon class.</p><p>Nayeon didn’t talk to her for a week and that made Mina confused, thinking what did she do wrong for Nayeon to avoid her. Mina always wait for Nayeon during her lunch break at her usual spot, hoping for her to show up. Sometimes, she would send good morning/goodnight messages to Nayeon until she stopped. Mina thought she was disturbing Nayeon so she just waited.</p><p>Mina waited but she didn’t notice that she’s waiting for Nayeon for a month.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina thought she already knew Nayeon.</p><p>But when Nayeon looked at her, Mina felt like she could fall into those eyes.</p><p>Because her eyes reminded her of the ocean.</p><p>Deep, calm and easy to get lost in.</p><p>And just like the ocean, Nayeon’s eyes were mysterious.</p><p>Behind those deep brown orbs hide the pain and secrets Nayeon was burying all these years.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>They were watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind upon Mina’s request at their shared apartment. Sana and Momo begged Mina to come out of her room and <em>for once</em>, take a rest from studying. The younger girl distracted herself by reading her text books, her habit to avoid people (and also to avoid thinking about Nayeon but it didn’t work).</p><p>Mina agreed but still read her text book on the couch, her friends sitting beside her, and didn’t mind the chaotic mess they were doing. Maybe, because she’s used to their crazy antics.</p><p>Even if she’s the one who requested the movie, Mina didn’t spare a glance. Maybe, because she already watched it with Nayeon before.</p><p>“I saw Nayeon at a café,” Sana said while munching her chips while Momo was watching the movie. And at the mention of Nayeon’s name, Sana caught Mina’s attention.</p><p>Acting like she didn’t care, she continued reading but replied, “How is she?”</p><p>“She looks fine but…” Sana stared at Mina, wondering if she would say it. “I think she needs you, Mitang.”</p><p>This time, Mina averted her gaze from her book and stared at her best friend. Mina was worried but confused. “What do you mean?”</p><p>Sana bit her lip, contemplating if she would talk about it with Mina. “A friend of mine told me that Nayeon wasn’t attending their class for almost a month when I mentioned her. And I think Jeongyeon and Jihyo didn’t know since they’re attending different classes and if they would, they will ask you about it.”</p><p>Mina clenched her jaw, her pride weighing up on her and continued reading.</p><p>“She needs you, Mitang.” Sana repeated, worried.</p><p>“But does she need me?”</p><p>Sana and Momo both looked at her and knew that Mina, <em>their Mitang, </em>for the first time, didn’t have the confidence to prove someone her worth.</p><p>“Mina…” Momo uttered, worried about the younger girl.</p><p>Mina could feel the tears filling up her eyes and she knew she couldn’t take it anymore.</p><p>“I like Nayeon.”</p><p>For the past month, Nayeon didn’t leave her mind. She’s afraid to put a label to her feelings towards Nayeon but she should’ve seen it coming.</p><p>“Nayeon makes me happy, you know? I want to hear her laugh. I want to see her every time. I want to listen to what happened to her day. I want to look at her when she’s telling me stories. I want to see her beautiful smile. I want to look at her pretty brown eyes.” Mina almost choke because of the tears rolling down her cheeks, unable to control them. “I want to be with Nayeon,” She confessed.</p><p>Mina’s eyes were filled with tears, “But how can I if she’s pushing me away?”</p><p>Sana and Momo remained quiet.</p><p>“It’s scary.”</p><p>Mina always thought about it, the risks of falling in love. It was scary and it was terrifying. But then, she remembered Nayeon’s eyes that turned into crescent moons and Nayeon’s bunny teeth whenever she smiles.</p><p>All she could ever think about was Nayeon.</p><p>
  <em>Nayeon. Nayeon. Nayeon.</em>
</p><p>And then suddenly, she didn’t need to be afraid anymore.</p><p>Mina bit her lip to stop it from wobbling, looking sternly at her best friends. “But I would risk it all for her.”</p><p>Sana hugged her, “Then, go get her.” She whispered.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>If Nayeon was a drug, Mina was sure as hell she’s addicted.</p><p>Mina found herself pacing back and forth outside Nayeon’s apartment complex, contemplating if she should go inside and talk to her. But before she could enter, Nayeon, the girl who she couldn’t get out of her mind, appeared.</p><p>“Are you waiting for me?”</p><p>Mina couldn’t tear her eyes away from the older girl. This was the first time she saw Nayeon after a month of not seeing and talking to her.</p><p>Im Nayeon was one of the prettiest girls in the university and Mina was sure of it. Her alluring brown eyes, her soft and luscious lips and the way her eyes shine whenever she smiles, Mina knew she fell deep.</p><p>But there was something different about Nayeon. Her eyes weren’t that bright as before.</p><p>As if she didn’t talk to Mina for a month, Nayeon leaned against the door frame, crossing her arms. “What is it, Dr. Myoui?”</p><p>Mina smiled at the nickname, missing how the nickname easily slipped out of Nayeon’s tongue. She liked it when Nayeon called her Dr. Myoui. “Are you busy?”</p><p>“No. Why?”</p><p>Instead of asking her if they can talk, Mina replied, “I want to show you something.”</p><p>Nayeon looked at Mina sternly, “You won’t kidnap me or anything?” Mina rolled her eyes while Nayeon laughed at her. “Kidding!”</p><p>They didn’t go far from the university but the path they were walking was like a hill. Since both of them didn’t have a car, Nayeon was exhausted from walking.</p><p>“We just passed by your building, Mina. Are we going to Busan? Jesus, we should take the KTX then!” She complained.</p><p>Mina laughed, “You’re so dramatic. We’re almost there.”</p><p>Nayeon whined but followed Mina who was already walking towards a big bush. “Are we going to a secret jungle or something?”</p><p>They were at the back of a building. Fences, large bushes were in front of them and it looked like a dead end.</p><p>“Nope.” Mina replied and then, looked back at her. “Come with me.” She said, offering her hand to Nayeon.</p><p>Nayeon looked at her hand and then, accepted it but she still looked confused. “Where are we going?” She asked.</p><p>Mina smiled, squeezing Nayeon’s hand, reassuring her, “You’ll see.” She said before going through the bushes with Nayeon following behind.</p><p>Showing Nayeon her safe space felt like showing her world to her. Mina thought she fall even harder when her gaze landed on Nayeon who was admiring the view.</p><p>Mina liked looking at Nayeon. Because of the way her eyes were full of happiness, how her lips looked so soft and how she was admiring the things around her.</p><p>Mina could look at Nayeon forever.</p><p>“I didn’t know there’s a place like this.”</p><p>“I think no one knows.” Mina sat down on the bench after dusting it out, “I think it was supposed to be a park but they abandoned it because who would want to go to a park in the back of a building?”</p><p>“You would.”</p><p>“Right.” Mina giggled, “Do you like it?”</p><p>“Of course! You could see the city lights from here!” Nayeon sat down beside her. “It’s beautiful.”</p><p>Mina, still looking at Nayeon, replied, “Beautiful.”</p><p>Behind the large bushes was a view overlooking the city. It was supposed to be a park but they didn’t finish it and ever since Mina found this place, she always went there when she needed a time to be alone.</p><p>It was perfect for a girl like Mina. It’s quiet and refreshing when she needed a time to breathe.</p><p>And now, she shared the place with Nayeon.</p><p>“Am I the first one you brought here?” Mina nodded, “Are you sure? I don’t want to be the second one, Myoui. I always want to be the first!”</p><p>“You’re the first one.”</p><p>Nayeon chuckled and Mina felt like it’s music to her ears. She was surprised when Nayeon leaned against her shoulder and held her hand. “I’m sorry,” Nayeon tightened the hold on her hand, “for avoiding you.”</p><p>“It’s okay,” Mina squeezed her hand and then, kissed the top of her head. “I understand.”</p><p>Mina knew Nayeon had a reason but she didn’t want to push the buttons and let Nayeon tell her when she’s ready.</p><p>She breathed deeply, nervous. This is the perfect time to tell her. The familiar scent of Nayeon’s perfume made Mina’s mind extremely blank.</p><p>Mina thought she was in a dazed.</p><p>Mina looked at the other girl and she already caught her staring. She saw how Nayeon’s gaze went from her eyes to her lips and the way she was leaning closer already made Mina breathless.</p><p>“Can I kiss you?”</p><p>Mina felt like she just jumped off a cliff. The way her heart beats faster made her think <em>is this even real?</em></p><p>Her throat went dry and just gave Nayeon a nod, unable to think clearly because of how their faces were inches apart.</p><p>The next thing she knew, Nayeon was kissing her.</p><p>When she felt Nayeon’s lips press against her, Mina felt like she’s home. Because Nayeon’s kiss brings warmth and sweet taste. She found herself holding Nayeon’s face, bringing her closer.</p><p>Mina remembered how she thought what it feels like to kiss Nayeon.</p><p>Nayeon’s kisses were like drugs and Mina was craving for more.</p><p>Mina couldn’t think straight because there was something deeper about Nayeon. Something stronger that Mina couldn't think what it was. Mina is a smart person but when it came to Nayeon, her mind goes blank.</p><p>Because all she could ever think of was Nayeon's soft lips pressing against her.</p><p>Mina felt her heart beat so fast when she felt Nayeon’s tongue slid inside her mouth. She felt like the time stopped for a moment. And when she kissed back, it felt like it sets her on fire.</p><p>Nayeon was the first one to pull back, breathless. Mina guessed she was the same. Nayeon’s lips were swollen and Mina felt like her lips was tingling.</p><p>When Mina looked at her eyes and she knew she couldn’t take it anymore.</p><p>Because Nayeon's eyes were like the ocean, so deep and mysterious. Mina knew how to swim yet she found herself drowning.</p><p>"Don’t ever do that again.” Mina whispered, her forehead still leaning against hers. The pain she felt for the past month were still there. "If you think avoiding me will make me leave you, I won’t. But Nayeon…"</p><p>She heard Nayeon's breath hitched, her grip on the hem of Mina’s shirt tightening. "Let me know every part of you. Not just the world sees but also the broken parts of you."</p><p>No matter how deep Nayeon's eyes were, Mina will let herself drown in them.</p><p>"The ones that are also part of you. Your giggles, your smiles, your jokes, your flaws, your mistakes, everything." Mina felt like she was out of breath. "I want every part of you, Nayeon." Their faces were inches apart. "Don't think about the world. Don't think that you're not worthy of love. Don't think about other people will say."</p><p>Mina gulped, <em>it's now or never.</em> "Because it's us against the world."</p><p>Mina didn't let herself lose control before.</p><p>But that's the thing about Nayeon.</p><p>It's the way she made Mina lose control.</p><p> </p><p>(Nayeon replied with a kiss.</p><p>And at that moment, Mina knew she got her answer.)</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Dating Nayeon was the unexpected adventure that came into her life.</p><p>Nayeon was trouble and madness.</p><p>Nayeon was wild and free.</p><p>Nayeon was insanely chaotic.</p><p>She came into Mina’s quiet and peaceful world without warning.</p><p>But in the middle of her chaos, there was home.</p><p>Nayeon brought warmth and happiness into her life.</p><p>Nayeon was the safe feeling when she’s home in Japan.</p><p>Nayeon was her peaceful haven.</p><p>Nayeon was the comfort in this tiring and crazy world.</p><p>Nayeon was the risk and certainty all at once.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Sana and Momo screamed when Mina told them that she’s dating Nayeon. After a series of jumping around and squealing, Sana and Momo turned around to face Nayeon. They were scary, looking as if they were about to kill someone.</p><p>Mina laughed when she saw how bewildered Nayeon was when her friends told her that they won’t hesitate to take Mina away from her if their friend comes home crying.</p><p>Nayeon made a quick nod and mentally noted not to mess with Sana and Momo.</p><p>After that, Sana and Momo hugged Nayeon, as if they weren’t just threatening her life a few seconds ago.</p><p>On the other hand, Jeongyeon and Jihyo hugged Mina the moment she stepped into their shared apartment.</p><p>Mina had no idea what she did.</p><p>And when they started dating, it’s either Mina or Nayeon was sleeping over at each other’s place.</p><p>They were inseparable.</p><p>Since Mina had a hectic class schedule than Nayeon, Nayeon would finish her class and wait at Mina, Sana, and Momo’s shared apartment. Mina didn’t like Nayeon spending her time in the lobby waiting for her so she persisted her to wait in the apartment. When she got home, she would find her girlfriend sleeping peacefully, law text books scattered on her bed.</p><p>On weekends, it’s Mina’s turn to sleep over at Nayeon’s shared apartment. Since Jeongyeon and Jihyo usually went home, they didn’t have any problem spending their private time together.</p><p>One time, Jeongyeon came home a day early and she heard Nayeon’s faint moans coming from her room.</p><p>Mina apologized the next morning while Nayeon just complained <em>why did you come home so fucking early?</em></p><p>When Jihyo found out about Jeongyeon’s complaint, she didn’t mind. As long as she won’t hear Nayeon’s <em>‘ascending to heaven’</em> moment.</p><p>Jeongyeon felt like she got a new roommate and she thought it would be the best for her friends so she suggested that they should get their own apartment.</p><p>“Are you kicking me out, Yoo Jeongyeon?!” Nayeon raised her voice.</p><p>“It’s not that!” Jeongyeon said in defense, “I’m just saying that instead of wasting your energy on going at each other’s apartments and having your own stack of clothes in a corner, you should just live together!” Jeongyeon scolded, she’s so tired of coming home and hearing Nayeon’s moans as if it was a broken record (Mina thought Nayeon’s moans were heavenly). “You’re basically living together. How about get your own place?”</p><p>“You just want Jihyo all to yourself.” Nayeon teased while Mina laughed beside her.</p><p>“S-shut up!" Jeongyeon’s cheeks were red because of embarrassment (and maybe, because Nayeon was <em>partly</em> right). She thought of another reason and she knew Nayeon won’t reject it. “No one could disturb your sex when you have your own apartment.”</p><p>Nayeon nodded, considering Jeongyeon’s suggestion. “You’re right.” Then, turned to Mina. “We should look for an apartment!”</p><p>
  <em>Fucking hell.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>The next thing she knew, she’s dating Im Nayeon for almost three years.</p><p>Her love for Nayeon grew deeper every single day and Mina never thought she could love someone so much the way she loved Nayeon.</p><p>Being with Nayeon felt like a rollercoaster ride. The way her heart beats faster when Nayeon smiled at her, bunny teeth showing and her eyes gleaming.</p><p>But a rollercoaster ride doesn’t always stay on top.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“Do you want me to pick you up?” Mina asked, talking to Nayeon on the phone.</p><p>Nayeon spent her time in the library ever since her third year of law school started. Mina knew how stressful the third year of law school was, seeing Nayeon was always coming home late and exhausted. Her girlfriend spent more time in the library than in their apartment. The upcoming national bar examinations taking a toll on her so Mina tried understanding her girlfriend better.</p><p>Mina asked why Nayeon had to go to the library when she could’ve just study at their place. Nayeon answered her that she liked the quiet atmosphere and there were so many distractions in their apartment.</p><p>And that included Mina.</p><p>Mina didn’t ask her again and let Nayeon do her own thing.</p><p>She heard rustling sounds in the background. <em>“I have something to do. Just wait for me in the restaurant, babe.”</em></p><p>Mina could’ve smiled at the nickname but found it odd to hear Nayeon whispering. But then, she remembered that her girlfriend was in the library. “Okay. I’ll order once I arrived. Same order?”</p><p><em>“Yes—”</em> Nayeon was cut off when a man spoke in the background. <em>“#24, Miss Im Nayeon?”</em></p><p>Mina frowned, “Who was that?”</p><p><em>“N-nothing! See you later. Bye!”</em> Nayeon hung up.</p><p>Mina’s eyebrows were furrowed because of their phone call but decided to shrugged it off.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>But she couldn’t.</p><p>Nayeon arrived thirty-minutes late and the food has gone cold but Mina didn’t drop the question.</p><p>Nayeon kissed her on the cheek and sat down in front of her, “I’m so sorry. I took a bus and I forgot that it’s rush hour so the traffic—"</p><p>Mina just smiled, “It’s okay. Let’s eat?”</p><p>Guilt can be seen in Nayeon’s eyes but she started to eat, stealing glances at Mina from time to time. Mina could feel the impending tension in the air but she just silently ate the food on her plate.</p><p>Nayeon knew she’s mad.</p><p>But Mina didn’t dare to speak and ate in silence.</p><p>She knew something was up but she wanted Nayeon to tell her without asking a question.</p><p>Mina waited for Nayeon to say something but it never came.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>That night, Mina couldn’t sleep.</p><p>Mina felt that something was wrong.</p><p>She turned to the other side of the bed and stared at Nayeon who was sleeping.</p><p>She thought of the past three years with Nayeon, the way she brought happiness to her life.</p><p>Mina snuggled closer to Nayeon, hugging her waist.</p><p>
  <em>Nayeon is the love of my life. My girlfriend. I trust her with all my heart.</em>
</p><p>Mina whispered, “We’re okay,” before going to sleep.</p><p>
  <em>We’re okay.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>(They’re not.)</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“Hey, Mina,” Momo called out, “Are you finish with the final requirement for Professor Lee?”</p><p>Mina was hanging out with Momo after their class. Since no one was with her at their apartment and because Nayeon was still in class, she hanged out with her friend.</p><p>“Oh, the research?” Momo nodded, “I just finished it last night. You?”</p><p>“I’m almost done but…” Momo looked down, fiddling with her fingers. “I’m confused in some parts of my research. Can you help me out?”</p><p>Mina chuckled, “Of course, Momoring.”</p><p>“Thanks! Tomorrow, then!”</p><p>Mina checked her watch and then, stuffed her things inside her bag. “Nayeon’s last class will end in ten minutes. I’ll get going.” She walked towards the entryway, picked up her shoes and started to wear it. “Sana is about to come home, right?”</p><p> “Yeah, she texted me. She’s on her way home.”</p><p>“Okay. See you tomorrow, Momoring.” Mina waved Momo goodbye before closing the door.</p><p>When Mina reached Nayeon’s college building, she sat down on her usual spot, waiting for her girlfriend. After a few minutes, she spotted Jeongyeon and Jihyo on their way out.</p><p>Mina waved at them and the two walked straight to her, smiling.</p><p>“Waiting for Nayeon?” Jihyo asked.</p><p>Mina nodded in agreement, “I didn’t know you still have class.”</p><p>“Nah.” Jeongyeon waved out. “We just went to the library, preparing for the bar exams.”</p><p>“It must be tough,” Mina remembered how Nayeon always came home exhausted, probably from the amount of reading law books all day. “Nayeon is always at the library. She spends her time at the library more than in our apartment. She only comes home just to take a shower and sleep.”</p><p>Jeongyeon and Jihyo looked at each other, confused.</p><p>“I understand her, though. She said she likes the atmosphere in the library. It makes her think clearly.”</p><p>“But Mina…” Jihyo’s tone sounded confused, “We haven’t seen Nayeon in the library these days.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“We’re uhm—” Jeongyeon scratched her nape, she looked like she didn’t know what to say. “We’re always in the library. Most of the third-year law students are but Nayeon wasn’t there. And if she’s there, we could’ve seen her. We thought she’s studying in your apartment.”</p><p>“We didn’t bother asking her where she is because the national bar examinations is near. Nayeon is always cranky when her brain is full of law cases so we assumed she’s with you.” Jihyo added.</p><p>
  <em>Where else could she be?</em>
</p><p>“Oh.” The only thing she can say because all she knew, Nayeon was studying.</p><p>Mina felt betrayed.</p><p>
  <em>Nayeon was lying?</em>
</p><p>“I’m sorry, Mina. We should’ve told you. We didn’t know.” Jeongyeon apologized.</p><p>“No, it’s okay. I’ll talk to Nayeon about it.” Mina gave her friends a half-hearted smile.</p><p>Suddenly, Jeongyeon remembered something. “But…”</p><p>Mina looked at Jeongyeon who was hesitating to say something. But before she tells Mina what she knew, Jihyo beat her to it, as if they were thinking the same thing.</p><p>“We will be honest with you, Mina…” Jihyo gulped, thinking if she should say it to her friend. “We heard rumors about Nayeon…”</p><p>“Rumors?”</p><p>“We thought it was just useless rumors so we ignored it. But when we knew that she’s not with you and always missing, the rumors are basically starting to make sense.” Jeongyeon explained.</p><p>“What rumors?”</p><p>Jeongyeon and Jihyo hesitated because they didn’t want to meddle with their relationship. Jihyo knew Jeongyeon didn’t have the heart to tell Mina but she needed to know the truth.</p><p>Jihyo dropped the bomb.</p><p>“We heard she dropped out.”</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Nayeon came home past 2AM.</p><p>She knew Mina has an exam that morning and Nayeon was expecting her to be sleeping quietly on their bed. But she found Mina waiting for her on the couch, still widely awake and waiting for her girlfriend to come home.</p><p>When Mina heard the door open, the first thing she said was, “Are you lying?” loud enough for Nayeon to heard it.</p><p>Mina wanted to know the truth.</p><p>Nayeon knew she fucked up.</p><p>With hurried steps, Nayeon walked towards her girlfriend, putting down her things on the side table. “I’m about to tell you—”</p><p>“When?” Mina didn’t let Nayeon finish her excuses, standing up and facing her girlfriend. “Or you have no plans on telling me?”</p><p>“Mina, listen to me…” Nayeon pleaded, tears starting to form in her eyes. “I didn’t know what to do and I—”</p><p>“Don’t you trust me?”</p><p>Mina remembered the night she confessed to Nayeon, at the abandoned park hidden away from the world and under the stars that shine brightly like Nayeon’s eyes.</p><p>And when she looked at Nayeon, the same girl that she fell in love years ago. Mina thought the world won against her.</p><p>Nayeon looked so <em>defeated.</em></p><p>“I knew you were hiding something,” Mina couldn’t help but to cry, her tears rolling down her cheeks. “But why did you lie to me?”</p><p>“If I told you all of my secrets, you would never look at me the same.” Nayeon admitted, “There are so many things that was running on my mind, Mina. It was making me <em>insane</em>.” The confession felt like darts striking at Mina’s heart. “Should I tell Mina I dropped out of law school? Should I tell Mina that the moment I told my parents I dropped out, they disowned me? Should I tell Mina that instead of becoming a lawyer, I wanted to become an actress?”</p><p>For the first time, Mina saw the truth in Nayeon’s eyes.</p><p>The pain, the sacrifices, <em>everything</em>.</p><p>“I couldn’t take it anymore. I don’t want to be a lawyer. I don’t want to do something others tell me to do. I don’t want to pretend for the rest of my life.”</p><p>Mina couldn’t imagine the pain Nayeon was feeling.</p><p>“I-I’m sorry…” Nayeon choked because of the tears, “I told you that I’m studying for the bar exams but I’m not. I was busy trying to get acting jobs and auditioning left and right…”</p><p>Nayeon sat down on the couch, exhausted. “I gave up everything, Mina. But I don’t care. The moment I dropped out of law school, it felt like I got out of my cage. I was free for the first time in 23 years.”</p><p>Nayeon’s continuous sobbing could be heard across the room and Mina couldn’t bear seeing her girlfriend who was breaking apart.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Nayeon looked up, confused. Mina kneeled in front of her, holding her hands and kissing it. “for not understanding you better.”</p><p>Nayeon sniffed and Mina found her cute because of her red nose. “I should be the one saying sorry…”</p><p>“It’s okay, Nayeonnie.” Mina’s soft and gentle voice melted her. “You were afraid. I understand.” Mina kissed her on the forehead, “But let’s not keep this kind of things between us, okay?”</p><p>Nayeon nodded and Mina chuckled when she wiped her nose using her sleeve.</p><p>“I told you, didn’t I?” Mina hugged her girlfriend, promising herself that she will protect Nayeon against the world.</p><p>“Show me every part of you and I will love you even more.”</p><p> </p><p>(Nayeon fell asleep on the couch, her head resting on Mina’s chest while hugging her waist. Mina didn’t care if her arm will get numb tomorrow and she had no idea how did they fit in their couch. All she’s thinking about was how strong and passionate Nayeon was.</p><p>Back then, she only thought of becoming a doctor.</p><p>But now, she’s also thinking about her future and this time, it’s with Nayeon.</p><p>It will always be with Nayeon.</p><p>Mina kissed her forehead, hugging her girlfriend tightly and chuckled softly when she heard Nayeon’s soft snore.</p><p><em>It will always be you and me, Nayeonnie.</em>)</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>The days passed by like a blur.</p><p>Nayeon became busy practicing for her upcoming auditions while Mina was already starting her fourth year of medicine.</p><p>“Nayeonnie, how about try entering an acting school?” Mina suggested when they were watching Doctor Strange, one of Mina’s favorite movies. “You can easily get a role in a drama when you’re in an acting school, right?”</p><p>Nayeon declined, saying she had no money for an acting school. And before Mina could say that she would pay for all the fees, Nayeon said she didn’t want to spend her two years in an acting school without acting in a drama or a movie, considering her age. Mina laughed at her statement and because of that, she got a hard slap on her arm.</p><p>Mina knew that Nayeon preferred working independently, she could see it in their almost four years of dating. When Nayeon was still in law school, she never asked for help. One of the few things that Mina admired about her.</p><p>But most of the time, Nayeon couldn’t do a simple thing.</p><p>Like opening a bottle of ketchup.</p><p>Mina learned that Nayeon was passing her portfolio to a lot of advertisement and production companies when she saw a bunch of printed papers on her girlfriend’s desk, trying if she could pass any of them.</p><p>Nayeon landed a few small roles in dramas and movies but she was also trying her luck if she could get the female lead.</p><p>Unfortunately, she couldn’t.</p><p>Mina has always been a light sleeper and it’s no doubt she’ll woke up on the sound of Nayeon’s stern voice that was coming from outside their room. She took a peek at their digital clock on their bedside table and frowned, seeing it was 3 AM. Nayeon should’ve been sleeping because she has an upcoming audition in the morning.</p><p>Still hazy from her sleep, Mina stood up and went to their living room. Balcony doors were open, the wind was blowing out their curtains and she found Nayeon on a phone call standing in their balcony.</p><p>“Joohyun again?” Nayeon brushed up her hair, frustrated. She still didn’t notice her girlfriend walking towards her. “That <em>bitch</em> keeps on sabotaging my auditions!” Mina heard Nayeon scoffed when she got closer. “You want me to what?”</p><p>Mina could hear the disbelief in her voice and the girl flinched on how Nayeon’s voice sound <em>so </em>intimidating.</p><p>“I wouldn’t do that, Jennie. You know me!” Nayeon tighten her grip on the railings, her knuckles turning white. “I would choose to be jobless than do a fucking role with that <em>bitch!</em>”</p><p>Nayeon hung up, still frustrated. After a few minutes of calming herself down, she turned around and almost jumped, seeing her girlfriend standing behind her who looked surprised from her sudden outburst.</p><p>With a soft voice, Nayeon asked, “Did I wake you?” as if she wasn’t cursing someone earlier. Still silent, Nayeon murmured, “Let’s go back to sleep.” before she walked back towards their room.</p><p>The younger girl was still in shocked, a lot of things running inside her mind.</p><p>Mina wondered if Nayeon was still the same girl she loved four years ago.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Seeing Nayeon enjoying the thing she loves had something sparked inside Mina. The confident aura whenever she stood on stage during her auditions and the way her lines effortlessly rolled off her tongue, her burning passion can be seen throughout her performance.</p><p>Or maybe because of her genuine happiness?</p><p>The way Nayeon was born to be an actress?</p><p>Mina didn’t know.</p><p>All she knew was she would always support Nayeon as long as she could see how happy she was every time she’s acting, even if it was just a small role in a drama or a movie.</p><p>Mina remembered that Nayeon was the certainty she needed in her life.</p><p>But Mina forgot that Nayeon was also life itself, a daring and unpredictable adventure.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“Satang, have you seen Mina?” Momo asked as soon as they entered the lecture room, looking around.</p><p>Because of the mention of Mina’s name, Sana looked around, searching for the younger girl.</p><p>“That’s weird.” Sana frowned when she didn’t see Mina sitting at her usual seat and glanced back at Momo. “Mina always entered the lecture room before us, right? She never came late.”</p><p>Momo glanced at the wall clock and it’s almost time before the professor walks in, “I think we should call her. We have an important test today, Sana. You think she forgot about it?”</p><p>Sana, already calling her friend, shook her head. “Mina never forgets an exam, Momoring.”</p><p>Sana’s fingers drummed her desk, impatient because of the unending rings whenever she called Mina.</p><p>“She’s not picking up, Momo!” Sana exclaimed, seeing Momo who was already calling someone on her phone.</p><p>“Hey, Nayeon. Is Mina with you?” Momo asked, frowning. “She’s already coming back? From where?”</p><p>Sana was looking at Momo intently, her eyebrows furrowing because <em>where would Mina go minutes before the start of their exam?</em></p><p>“She went to your audition? We have—” A short pause until Momo lowered down her phone. “She hung up. Her break was over.” She clicked out her tongue, annoyed. “Mina went to Nayeon’s audition and she’s already on her way back.”</p><p>“What was she thinking? She only has a few minutes left!”</p><p>Sana almost curse but before Momo could reply, their professor walked in.</p><p>But Mina was still nowhere to be found.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Instead of taking an exam, Mina need to pass a requirement that will only give her half the grade if she just took the test. She had no other choice but to submit it even if it won’t change anything.</p><p>Sana and Momo scolded her (Mostly Sana) because it’s the first time Mina prioritized other things than her studies. The younger girl brushed it off, saying it was okay and she already handled it.</p><p>But it wasn’t okay.</p><p>She should’ve expected it the moment she received an <em>almost</em> failing grade because of her absences and missed requirements. Her father called her and threatened her that if she failed, he wouldn’t hesitate to cut off her allowance and wait for her to come back in Japan to study law.</p><p>Mina looked at her girlfriend who fallen asleep, her head on the coffee table while her scripts were scattered on the floor. She unconsciously let out a soft smile, seeing Nayeon hugging the stuff toy she won before.</p><p>Mina needed to get her head back in the game.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>babe</em>
</p><p>
  <em>are u busy?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>can u get my dress? the black one?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>i was in a hurry and i didn’t notice that i left it this morning</em>
</p><p>
  <em>if u can’t, i can just take the subway</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Don’t worry</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I’m on my way</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>are u sure?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Yep </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I still have time</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Mina was busy studying for her long test with Sana and Momo when she got Nayeon’s text message. She stood up from her seat and started fixing her stuff.</p><p>When Mina was fixing her things in a hurry, Momo became distracted when she heard Mina dropped some of her things from her bag, unusually not like her. Momo averted her gaze away from her book and asked, “Where are you going?”</p><p>Mina didn’t even spare her a glance, busy putting her stuff inside her bag in a haste. “I’m just gonna get Nayeon’s dress from our apartment and give it to her. She has an audition today.”</p><p>Sana couldn’t help but to scoff in disbelief, “We have a test later, Mitang.” Sana reminded the younger girl.</p><p>Mina knew Sana was just worried about her. She took a peek at her watch, “I still have an hour.” Sana wasn’t convinced. “I’ll be fast. It’s not that far. I promised.” Sana was still glaring at her so Mina tried convincing Momo, “I can still catch up. Right, Momoring?” She tried getting a <em>positive </em>feedback from her other friend but Momo only looked at her, worried.</p><p>The younger girl knew their upcoming test have a huge impact in her grade if she didn’t take it, considering their terror and strict professor. But Mina convinced herself that she could make it. She kept on saying that <em>Nayeon needed her</em> to motivate herself.</p><p>“I’ll message you when I’m on my way back. See you!” Mina waved them goodbye.</p><p>Sana and Momo looked dejected, their shoulders slumped while watching Mina walked away.</p><p> </p><p>(Mina was unable to take the test that day.</p><p>And this wasn’t her first time.)</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“Professor Park, please give me a chance. I had an urgent thing to do that’s why I couldn’t make it on time—”</p><p>Professor Park halted her steps, looking back at her top student who was slowly failing her marks because of her absences. “If this was your first time, I would give you a second chance, Miss Myoui.” Her statement broke Mina’s heart. “You’ve been my student for four years and you’re one of the top students. I know you’ll be a great doctor someday but,” Professor Park sighed, her eyes full of concern. “you’re not like this, Mina. Did you know your marks are slowly failing? The other professors are also telling me that you had a lot of absences.”</p><p>Mina couldn’t look at her professor in the eye, embarrassed. Her head hanging low while listening to her.</p><p>“What’s wrong, Mina?” Her professor’s tone sounded like she was worried and Mina knew that she was concerned about her. Professor Park seemed that she’s like a strict mentor but under her facade, she’s like a mother for her students. “If you’ll keep on doing this, you know what will happen, right?”</p><p>Mina nodded, remembering her parents’ agreement with her.</p><p>“I’m sorry but I can’t let you take the test or pass another requirement.” Mina almost cried in front of her professor. “It’s still the middle of the semester. You can still bounce back.” Professor Park patted her shoulder and gave her a smile, reassuring her.</p><p>Mina mumbled, “Thank you, Professor. I will do my best.” and bowed before Professor Park walked away.</p><p>Breathing deeply, Mina convinced herself that she can make it.</p><p>Before she could go to her next class, Nayeon called her asking if she was free because she needed someone to practice lines with her.</p><p>Mina didn’t hesitate to say yes.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina almost fell on her seat when she heard the director shouted ‘cut’, his voice could be heard outside because of how loud it sounds, startling the exhausted and sleep-deprived college student. Her book still left wide open while her pencil was already fallen off from her hand. She didn’t notice that she already fallen asleep waiting for Nayeon to finish her shooting.</p><p>Nayeon got a small role in a movie, a high school girl that was friends with the female lead.</p><p>It’s not much but she’s getting there.</p><p>Mina lightly slapped her cheeks, trying to stay awake because she needed to read five long topics for her upcoming test tomorrow. She was sitting at one of the tables outside of the set, waiting for Nayeon to finish her shoot. After visiting her girlfriend and preparing her packed dinner, she decided to wait for her girlfriend outside so that Nayeon won’t take the bus alone.</p><p>But it’s been three hours since Nayeon’s break and Mina could fall asleep right there at the table. Mina was about to fall asleep again when she heard Nayeon’s voice coming from the set.</p><p>Mina thought it was just Nayeon shouting her lines but when she saw her girlfriend storming out of the set, eyebrows furrowed and jaw clenched, she immediately stood up and fixed her stuff.</p><p>Nayeon walked towards her, “Come on, Mina. Let’s get out of here.” Her voice stern and it made Mina shivered.</p><p>From her peripheral vision, she saw the producer walking out of the set, “Don’t come back here with that <em>disgusting </em>attitude, Im!” His voice raspy from shouting. “Learn your place, Nayeon. You’re not a female lead. You’re just a <em>fucking</em> extra.”</p><p>Mina saw how Nayeon’s fist clenched, her knuckles turning white. Not responding to the producer, Nayeon grabbed Mina’s wrist and walked away. Mina almost stumbled in her steps because of how quick Nayeon steps were.</p><p>When they got out of the building, Nayeon let go of her wrist and walked ahead of her. Mina following behind, her hands clutching her book while thinking if she would ask what happened. Instead of asking her, she thought on how she could uplift her girlfriend’s mood.</p><p>Testing the waters, Mina reached out for Nayeon’s hand and she was surprised how her hand naturally locked with hers.</p><p>She glanced at Nayeon and for the first time, Mina couldn’t read her eyes.</p><p>Before, Mina could see the galaxies casted in her eyes.</p><p>But now, she wondered when will she be able to see Nayeon’s eyes shine.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina was always the top student in her class ever since she was a kid.</p><p>It was no doubt that she’s an intelligent student. Getting a perfect score and acing all her tests, it was a normal thing for a student like Myoui Mina.</p><p>Until she received a failing grade for the first time in her life.</p><p>She should’ve seen it coming because of her missed requirements and absences. Mina did her best until the end of the semester but because of her lack of sleep, it really took a toll on her and ended up failing <em>one</em> of her subjects.</p><p>The moment her father received the news, he immediately froze her bank account, just like what he said in their agreement.</p><p>
  <em>If you come back to Japan, you’ll take law.</em>
</p><p>Mina had no other choice but to look for a job and apply for a scholarship.</p><p>Even if the world is against her, Mina would still fight for her dreams.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina easily landed a job as a server in a nearby café. When she got the job, she didn’t know that Chou Tzuyu, one of her high school schoolmates, owned the place she’ll work for.</p><p>Chou Tzuyu was one of the popular students (also Sana, Momo and Mina) and richest students when they were in high school. Because they were from different departments, she didn’t know that they were attending the same university. Tzuyu majored in business and even before she graduated, she’s already trying to enter the world of business.</p><p>Since Tzuyu only visited the café once a week, some of her employees didn’t get to see her.</p><p>Like one of their baristas, Son Chaeyoung. An art major, one year younger than Mina and a huge <em>art nerd</em>.</p><p>Mina was getting used to her work, saving up for their expenses during her semestral break while helping her girlfriend get a job.</p><p>Since Nayeon and the producer’s outburst in the set, Nayeon never passed a single audition. Mina thought this has something to do in Nayeon’s confrontation with the producer.</p><p>Nayeon never open up what happened in the set and Mina never ask, giving her space and afraid that Nayeon will give her a cold shoulder.</p><p>Because she’s getting rejected in her auditions, Nayeon became grumpy and short-tempered these days. After a long and exhausting day at work, Mina would be welcomed by Nayeon’s mess in their apartment.</p><p>Mina never complained, remembering her promise to Nayeon that she will do better.</p><p>She was currently applying for a scholarship when Nayeon came home one night, closing the door harshly and leaving her shoes in the entry way. Nayeon threw her bag and coat on the couch and walked straight towards their kitchen, ignoring her girlfriend and not minding the mess she left behind.</p><p>The younger girl closed her laptop and stood up, picking up Nayeon’s things that were thrown recklessly around the room. After she cleaned her mess, Mina found her girlfriend drinking a bottle of beer.</p><p>Mina sighed before walking closer to her girlfriend and was about to grab the bottle away from Nayeon’s hands but before she could take it, Nayeon pushed her away.</p><p>“Don’t,” The reply was firm. “Leave me alone.”</p><p>Nayeon’s voice sounded like a whisper but Mina could feel the harshness in her tone.</p><p>Mina tried ignoring the aching pain in her heart, worried about her girlfriend. “You have an audition tomorrow, Nayeonnie.” She attempted to sooth her by saying her nickname. “You might have a hang-over tomorrow. You said the piece was hard—”</p><p>“I won’t go to that <em>fucking </em>audition,” Mina flinched at her words, “not when Joohyun is around.”</p><p>They were dating for four years but Nayeon never told her about Joohyun. The first time she heard of Joohyun’s name was when Nayeon had a phone call months ago. Mina thought she was someone Nayeon loathed all these years.</p><p>“But Nayeon—”</p><p>“Leave me alone, Mina.” Her voice stern.</p><p>Mina could feel the tears forming in her eyes but tried her best not to cry in front of Nayeon. She gave Nayeon one last look and went to their bedroom, giving her space.</p><p>The walls were thin and Mina could hear the faint sobbing coming from the kitchen. She couldn’t sleep, not when her girlfriend was crying her eyes out not far away from her.</p><p>Turning her body on Nayeon’s side of the bed, she fixed her gaze at the picture on the bedside table.</p><p>It was a picture of Mina and Nayeon at the amusement park when they were first began dating. She vividly remembered the bittersweet memory. Nayeon was wearing a headband, the one Mina chose at the souvenir store because she thought that Nayeon looked like a bunny. Her girlfriend picked a Super Mario hat for her because Mina likes playing the Mario Kart game. Nayeon was enjoying blowing bubbles in front of her while she was busy writing on Minmin, Mina’s prize at a shooting game that she later gave to Nayeon.</p><p>In the picture, Nayeon’s smile was beaming and her eyes were sparkling while looking at the bubbles. Mina’s eyes were closed, as if making the most out of something. Nayeon was so enthusiastic when she found out that Momo took a picture of that moment that’s why she put it in a picture frame.</p><p>She wiped away her tears, sat and rested her back on the headboard of the bed. Her gaze landed on a stuff toy sitting on her desk across the room. Mina couldn’t remember when was the last time Nayeon held Minmin.</p><p>On Minmin’s back was written, <strong>NY + MN = </strong><strong>∞ </strong>encircled by a huge heart.</p><p>Like the ink on its back, Mina never thought that everything was fading away.</p><p>But it was actually happening.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“Mina! Order for table 4!” She heard Eunha shouted from the counter.</p><p>She was in their locker room, taking a quick break because she remembered that Nayeon needs to be on time at her audition. Reminding her girlfriend before she put back her phone in her locker, Mina almost stumbled in her steps on her way back.</p><p>Working at a café was exhausting and Mina didn’t expect it to be <em>this</em> busy, especially in the afternoon. She expected that the restaurant nearby would be packed because it was lunch time but it was the other way around. Mina heard a high school student said that the reason the café was popular was because of their <em>pretty</em> workers. She chuckled when she heard that.</p><p>Being a student and working at the same time was draining the <em>shit</em> out of Mina. Most of the time, she would doze off during the class. Fortunately, Sana and Momo were taking notes and would let her borrow it.</p><p>Coming home didn’t feel like <em>coming home</em>.</p><p>One night, she found Nayeon sitting on the floor, crumpled papers scattered everywhere and writing something on her notebook at their coffee table. Still wearing her uniform, Mina would clean up Nayeon’s mess.</p><p>Nayeon’s hair was disheveled and there were dark circles under her eyes, far from the girl that she met four years ago.</p><p>Mina’s love for her didn’t change but she couldn’t distinguish if she was still staying because she wanted to.</p><p>Or she needed to.</p><p>While cleaning, Mina remembered something, “Chaeyoung said she has a friend in an entertainment company.”</p><p>Nayeon didn’t reply, still writing on her notebook.</p><p>“I think her friend is a producer. Her name is Dahyun.” She tried looking at Nayeon’s notebook but she couldn’t see the contents. “Or a director? I don’t know but we can try, right?” Mina chuckled to liven the atmosphere but Nayeon still haven’t say anything.</p><p>Mina tried one more time, desperately wanting Nayeon to have an acting job. “I can ask for her friend’s number if you want.”</p><p>She flinched when Nayeon put down her pencil harshly on the table, startling her.</p><p>“I told you before that I don’t like using any <em>connections</em>, Mina.” Nayeon looked at her and <em>god</em>, Mina couldn’t remember when was the last time her girlfriend looked at her with pure happiness in her eyes. “Just let me handle it.”</p><p>Mina felt like she was stabbed in the chest but decided to brushed it off. “Yeah, of course.” She said before walking towards the kitchen and started to clean the dishes.</p><p>After a few minutes, she heard footsteps walking closer to her. She didn’t saw it coming. Because she felt Nayeon wrapping her arms around her waist, her chin resting on Mina’s shoulder.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Nayeon heaved a sigh. “I can’t control my mood these days. I—” Mina let her speak, pausing her task for a moment.</p><p>Because <em>damn</em>, when was the last time Nayeon held her like this?</p><p>“I’m trying, Mina. It’s just that…” Nayeon’s hug tightened, as if she was afraid Mina would leave her. “It feels like the world is against me. It didn’t like seeing me happy, you know? I’m sorry…” She apologized.</p><p>The younger girl sighed, reaching out to grab a towel to dry her hands and held Nayeon’s hand tightly, letting the silence enveloped them.</p><p>Mina’s gaze landed on their hands.</p><p>She was scared that if she let go, she’ll completely lose Nayeon, the love of her life.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>“And this is for Pathology.” Sana said after she gave Mina her notes.</p><p>Mina smiled while browsing Sana’s notes. “Thank you, Satang! Did Professor Song ask why I’m not in his class yesterday?”</p><p>“Yes. But I told him that you were sick,” Sana glared at her, crossing her arms and leaning her back against the back rest of her seat. “even if you’re clearly fine and working your ass off just to earn money for your bills.”</p><p>Mina’s shoulders went slumped. “Sana…”</p><p>Sana sighs, she should stop scolding her best friend but she need to realize that she should think of herself for once.</p><p>“I told you, right?” She reached out for Mina’s hand that was on the table and squeezed it. “If you need help, me and Momo are here for you.” Mina knew that her friends will always be there for her. Money wasn’t the issue for them but she couldn’t bear to ask money for her own good. “You’re in a scholarship, right? And you can get allowance for that. That’s enough for you to study here in Korea even without your father’s money. Why are you still working, Mitang?”</p><p>Mina looked away, embarrassed. “I need to work for Nayeon, Sana…” She whispered, didn’t want Sana to get angry at her girlfriend again. “My allowance isn’t enough for us…”</p><p>Sana couldn’t take it anymore, not when she could see how Mina’s dreams were falling apart.</p><p>“You’re sacrificing <em>everything</em>, Mina!”</p><p>Mina flinched, not because of how loud Sana’s scream was or how the other customers in the café were giving them unquestionable looks.</p><p>But because her truthful words<em> stung</em>.</p><p>Sana breathed deeply, calming herself down. Mina didn’t need an angry best friend but a supporting and understanding one.</p><p>“Talk to her, Mitang. Don’t keep the problems all to yourself. Tell her to get a job.”</p><p>“But her acting jobs weren’t—”</p><p>“I’m not talking about her acting career, Mina.” Sana’s tone was serious. And Mina knew that when Sana stopped calling her <em>‘Mitang’ </em>and instead called her <em>‘Mina’</em>, their conversation wasn’t fun and games. “She can get a job just like you. Work in a café, restaurant, anything! Just for her to help you out!”</p><p>Mina didn’t know what to say.</p><p>“Instead of reading her scripts, tell her to read the room.”</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina thought she was in the clouds because seeing Nayeon’s eyes that were full of genuine happiness felt like she was flying.</p><p>“I passed the audition, Mina!” Nayeon exclaimed, hugging her as soon as she saw her standing outside of the building after her audition. “I got a main role for a theatre play!”</p><p>Nayeon’s smile was beaming and Mina thought the sun would be envious of how bright her smile was.</p><p>They were enthusiastic because for the first time in a year, Nayeon got a main lead.</p><p>When she came back at the café, Chaeyoung was already smiling at her. “I heard Nayeon got the main role.” Chaeyoung leaned her back against the counter, crossing her arms. “She’s the talk of the town, you know.” Mina rolled her eyes because of how poetic Chaeyoung was, even in a casual conversation. “Some students in my department talked about how great she was. Even in singing!”</p><p>She couldn’t be any prouder.</p><p>Mina knew she was born for her role. Even if Nayeon would come home exhausted, she always had a smile on her face. Because finally, she’s actually doing what she wanted to do.</p><p>She didn’t realize that it almost been five months since Nayeon was rehearsing for her play and finally, the day that she was waiting for has come.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>babe</em>
</p><p>
  <em>where are you?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>i saw jeong and jihyo at the audience haha</em>
</p><p>
  <em>tell me when you arrived</em>
</p><p>
  <em>i love you</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Mina bumped to a few students on her way out of the building, hurrying to be on Nayeon’s play on time. She didn’t even have time to apologize because when she took a peek at her watch, the show was about to start.</p><p>Instead of taking the bus, she decided to take a cab for a faster route. She almost cursed when the cab stopped on the other side of the road and signaled her to just cross the street, maybe because of the lack of parking space on her side.</p><p>Because she was in a hurry, Mina didn’t even look around and just ran towards the cab.</p><p>And before she knew it, there was a car approaching her. Mina didn’t know <em>why on earth</em> she stopped running in the middle of the road.</p><p>It felt like the world had stopped moving, only the approaching car and her was on the street, and Mina had <em>seconds</em> to decide if she should <em>run or stay</em>.</p><p>But the blinding lights froze her and the deafening sound of the car horn was all she could hear.</p><p>Nayeon’s beaming smile flashed on her mind, as if it was the last scene she needed to see.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>The first thing Mina heard when she woke up was the beeping sound of the heart monitor a few beds away from her. Still hazy from her sleep, she immediately knew she was in the hospital because of the hurried steps of the nurses and the lingering smell of disinfectant. The curtains were closed and when she looked beside her, that’s when she noticed a girl sleeping while her head was resting on her arm.</p><p>Mina smiled, seeing Nayeon whose sleeping beside her. The younger girl thought her girlfriend was still wearing her costume from the play, clad in her red dress that she needed to use for her opening act. Nayeon was holding her hand, slightly loose because of restlessness. With her other hand, Mina gently stroked Nayeon’s hair.</p><p>Because of this, Nayeon woke up. She looked up and her eyes went wide because of shock, seeing Mina who was smiling at her.</p><p>Nayeon immediately stood up, hugging her girlfriend and carefully not to squeeze the younger girl because of her embrace. “Don’t ever do that again.” Mina could still feel the deep breathes coming from her girlfriend. “I-i was so scared, Mina. I—” Nayeon’s faint sobs was the only thing Mina could hear.</p><p>“I thought I lost you.”</p><p>Her grip on Nayeon’s shirt tightened and then, she pulled away from their hug. Looking at Nayeon’s eyes and with a soft voice, she said, “It’s okay.”</p><p>Mina smiled, her eyes shining, just like the stars on the sky the night she confessed. She cupped Nayeon’s cheeks, kissing her tears away.</p><p>“I’m not going anywhere.”</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Fortunately, the car stopped on time, a mere distance between the car and the girl. But because of shock, Mina fainted.</p><p>The doctor told them that the driver of the car was the one who called the ambulance and also paid the hospital bills. Mina didn’t get any serious wounds, aside from the bruise on her head and a scratch on her elbow when she fell down on the ground.</p><p>It wasn’t that serious for Mina but Nayeon didn’t leave her the moment she woke up.</p><p>When the doctor told them that they could go home after treating her bruises, Sana and Momo were the ones who picked them up. Nayeon assisted her to sit in the back seat while Sana and Momo sat on the front.</p><p>The ride home was silent and Momo kept on glancing from the rearview mirror while driving, a worried look on her face.</p><p>Mina knew that look, she fucked up. And she knew they were worried but Sana wasn’t saying a word.</p><p>When they reached their apartment complex, Momo sighed and Mina saw how Momo held Sana’s hands tightly, as if she was calming her down.</p><p>Before they stepped out of the vehicle, Sana murmured, “Take care of yourself, Mina.”</p><p>Sana faced the couple at the back, her eyes fixed on Nayeon. But before she said something, Momo tugged the hem of her shirt.</p><p>A pause.</p><p>Mina thought it was the longest minutes of her life, feeling the impending tension in the air. And she knew Nayeon was waiting for Sana to say something.</p><p>But Nayeon beat her to it. “I’m sorry.” Her voice was barely a whisper.</p><p>Mina bit her lip, she knew that Nayeon didn’t do anything wrong but why was she apologizing?</p><p>It was Mina’s fault, anyway.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>After a week, Mina came back to the university, just in time to study for their finals. Sana and Momo informed their professors that Mina was involved in a minor car accident and because of that, she was excused for a week.</p><p>“Study hard for your finals as if your life depends on it.” Professor Park told them before she dismissed the class. “We all know that you’ll be in your fifth year and your clinical training will start soon. And if you messed up your final exam, this time,” A dramatic pause, Professor Park was always like that during her lectures. “you will need to repeat the semester, understand?”</p><p>A series of ‘yes’ was heard and some students just nodded, agreeing to the professor.</p><p>
  <em>Huh.</em>
</p><p>“That means if you failed the final exam, you’ll be late, right?” Momo whispered, asking Sana who was sitting on her right side, talking about their internship.</p><p>Sana nodded, “The rest of the class will be in their internship while you’re stuck here studying for a program you failed.”</p><p>Mina thought it would be awful, shaking her head. “That sucks.”</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Tzuyu allowed her employees to take an early shift because of their finals.</p><p>As a student herself, Tzuyu knew how stressful the finals week was. She already saw how Chaeyoung spaced out in the middle of mixing coffees, messing some orders. And because she also needed to study, she allowed to close her café earlier than the usual.</p><p>Mina almost hugged her when Tzuyu told the crew because she needed <em>more time</em> to study for her upcoming examinations. She had no time to slack off, proving everyone that she won’t do the same mistake again.</p><p>But of course, as if the world was against her, it will destroy <em>everything.</em></p><p>She was busy writing in her post-it notes when she heard the buzz and a light <em>ding </em>of the door, indicating that Nayeon was home.</p><p>Mina was welcomed by her girlfriend but she was confused when she found Nayeon taking deep breathes while leaning her back against the door.</p><p>“Nayeon?”</p><p>Mina thought Nayeon didn’t know that she’s already in front of her but the girl just stared at her, her fist clenching at her sides.</p><p>“D-don’t…”</p><p>Nayeon couldn’t even form a sentence, her eyes forming tears, and Mina had no idea what’s going on.</p><p>
  <em>Say it.</em>
</p><p>It was ironic, how Mina could easily read Nayeon’s eyes for the past four years. But that night, the only thing Mina knew was Nayeon needed her.</p><p>
  <em>Tell me you need me.</em>
</p><p>The silence was deafening and only the sound of Nayeon’s deep breathes could be heard.</p><p>
  <em>And I would stay.</em>
</p><p>But all Nayeon said was, “Don’t wait for me tonight.” before she walked out and closed the door.</p><p>The sight of Nayeon walking out of their home felt like she was slowly walking out of Mina’s life.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>That night, Mina couldn’t sleep.</p><p>Mina knew something was wrong.</p><p>She turned to the other side of the bed and saw Nayeon’s side was empty.</p><p>She thought of the past months with Nayeon, the way everything was slowly falling apart.</p><p>Mina reached out Nayeon’s pillow, hugging it.</p><p>
  <em>Nayeon is the love of my life. My girlfriend.</em>
</p><p>Mina couldn’t even think of the last words she usually thought when they’re in a misunderstanding.</p><p>All she could think about was the love of her life was slowly becoming someone she never met.</p><p>
  <em>Nayeon is the love of my life.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My girlfriend.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>We were happy.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>We were perfect.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But why did we end up like this?</em>
</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p><em>“Mina, you knew that if you’re late for a final exam, they won’t give you another chance!”</em> Sana yelled from the other line.</p><p>Mina almost tripped when she stepped out of the taxi, her textbooks almost fell from her arms.  She almost cursed when she heard the sound of thunder rumbled in the sky, scaring her. Mina looked up, saw how dark clouds enveloping the sky, and it looks like it’ll rain.</p><p>“I know, Sana! Just give me ten minutes! I’ll be there!” She pleaded and then hung up.</p><p>She ran towards the entrance of the bar and was welcomed by a maintenance staff, cleaning the broken pieces of glass scattered on the floor. When her gaze landed on one of the tables, she saw Nayeon resting her head on the table, drunk.</p><p>“Are you Mina?” She didn’t even notice the staff and guessed he was the one who called her earlier. “That girl won’t leave the bar. I had to use her phone and call you.”</p><p>“Y-yeah.” Mina cleared her throat. She was <em>shaking</em>. “Did she do this?” She asked, pertaining about the broken glass.</p><p>“When a girl talked to her earlier, she suddenly threw the bottles and glasses to her. She screamed and tried to start a fight. We need to stop them before the other customers get involved.” The staff explained and gave her the receipt. “Here’s the bill for the total damages.”</p><p>Mina tried not to have a breakdown in front of the guy and with shaky hands, she paid the bill. Suddenly, her phone rang. Without taking a look at the caller’s ID, she knew it was Sana.</p><p>
  <em>“You have ten minutes before the test starts. Where are you?” </em>
</p><p>Mina lightly tapped Nayeon’s cheek, waking her up. “Thank you, Satang. I’ll go there after I dropped Nayeon at our apartment.”</p><p>
  <em>“You’ll what?!”</em>
</p><p>Mina ignored Sana’s scream on the phone, her tears falling down her cheeks, helping Nayeon to stand up but the girl only groaned. “Nayeonnie, wake up. Come on. Please help me out here.”</p><p>
  <em>“That girl have the nerves to get drunk?!”</em>
</p><p>Mina grabbed Nayeon’s coat and bag, swinging it into her shoulder.</p><p>
  <em>“For God’s sake, Mina! Are you really throwing away your dreams just for a girl?!”</em>
</p><p>Mina froze, Sana’s words were like a broken record.</p><p>
  <em>Am I really throwing away everything?</em>
</p><p>“N-noooo…M-mina…P-please….” Nayeon groggily said.</p><p>Mina looked at the wasted girl in front of her.</p><p>Without giving Sana a chance to finish her sentence, Mina hung up.</p><p>They went out of the bar, she put Nayeon’s arm over her shoulder, supporting her weight. But because Nayeon was <em>so</em> wasted, they stumbled and her books scattered on the ground.</p><p>And as if Mina wasn’t suffering enough, it began to rain.</p><p>Mina tried helping Nayeon to stand up but with wobbly legs, they kept on falling down. The books were already dirty and the two of them were drenched because of the rain. Mina felt her knees started to ache, maybe because of the amount of scratch.</p><p>“M-mina..I-I’m sorry...” Nayeon murmured and Mina couldn’t determine if Nayeon was crying or it was because of the rain.</p><p>“It’s okay. It’s okay, Nayeon. Get up.” Mina continued to sob, ignoring the people who were looking at them with pity.</p><p>Her phone started to ring and Mina had no choice but to answer it.</p><p>
  <em>“Where are you? It’s almost starting, Mina!”</em>
</p><p>Mina couldn’t even say anything. Her continuous sobbing and the pouring rain could only be heard.</p><p><em>“Just leave her, Mina! Are you really sacrificing your dream just for Nayeon?!” </em>Mina heard a gasp on the other line. <em>“Fuck, the proctor is here. Hurry up!”</em></p><p>Mina had no other choice but to leave her.</p><p>She helped Nayeon to sit on a waiting shed, the rain was still pouring hard. Mina signaled a taxi and before she left, she kissed Nayeon’s forehead.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Nayeon.” Her tears still streaming down her cheeks. Mina felt her heart was tearing apart. “Give me this one time. Just this once.” She begged and kissed Nayeon’s cheek one last time. “I’m sorry.” She whispered.</p><p>Mina heard the taxi driver called her, saying she’s taking too long. She entered the vehicle and looked at Nayeon before she left.</p><p>Nayeon’s head was resting on the pole, her clothes were dirty and drenched from the rain, drunk.</p><p>Nayeon looked so defeated, as if the world was winning against her.</p><p>Mina remembered her promise to Nayeon under the night sky four years ago.</p><p>
  <em>"Because it's us against the world."</em>
</p><p>Seeing Nayeon’s state, Mina knew she couldn’t leave Nayeon, not when she’s wasted and clothes were drenched because of the rain at the side of the road.</p><p>And at that moment, Mina couldn’t believe that she chose Nayeon over anything else.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>Mina was busy chasing Nayeon that she didn’t notice she stopped chasing her dreams.</p><p>Just to fix everything that was slowly being destroyed.</p><p>To stay even if there’s no reason to stay anymore.</p><p>But how could she fix things?</p><p>If Nayeon keeps on breaking her?</p><p>And how could she stay?</p><p>If the reason she’s staying was also the reason that she needs to let go?</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>Mina heard the front door open and she hoped she just went to sleep instead of reminiscing the memories she’s starting to regret. She heard light footsteps walking towards the kitchen.</p><p>“Happy anniversary, Mina.” Nayeon whispered and then, kissed her cheek.</p><p>Still not averting her gaze from her book, Mina ignored her. On the corner of her eye, Nayeon sat beside her while her hands were on her back, hiding something.</p><p>Mina turned the page of her book but Nayeon was still waiting for Mina to look at her. Nayeon gave up and showed Mina what she’s hiding.</p><p>“Ta-da!” Nayeon exclaimed, giggling and showing a bunny stuff toy with a pocket on her tummy. “I brought Minmin a friend! I think he’s getting lonely so when I saw a machine—”</p><p>Mina tried not to say <em>anything </em>but she’s tired of this<em> shit</em>.</p><p>Looking at her girlfriend, with cold eyes and jaw clenched, she uttered, “You have money to buy me a <em>fucking</em> doll but not a single penny for our bills.”</p><p>Nayeon became silent and Mina knew that they were both tired of the deafening silence in the house.</p><p>Mina convinced herself that she needed to rest. She didn’t want to talk to Nayeon tonight, not when her heart was full of anger and regret. The younger girl stood up and was about to walk towards their room when Nayeon held her wrist, stopping her.</p><p>“Mina,” Mina hated herself for wanting to let go. “Talk to me.”</p><p>Mina still didn’t face her because if she sees Nayeon’s eyes, she wouldn’t stop herself to <em>tell her everything.</em></p><p>Because the same eyes she used to adore became the ones she hated to see.</p><p>“Are you mad?”</p><p>Mina could’t help but to scoff in disbelief, facing Nayeon, her eyes already filling up with tears.</p><p>“If you’re mad, say something. If you’re tired, tell me.” Nayeon smiled but her tears started streaming down her cheeks. “I couldn’t bear looking at you who keeps on enduring everything.”</p><p>“Mina, please tell me what’s wrong.” Nayeon pleaded, closing her eyes tightly.</p><p>Mina finally let go of Nayeon’s grip, as if it was the thing she needed to do.</p><p>
  <em>If that’s what you want, I’ll tell you everything.</em>
</p><p>“I’m losing myself trying to find you.” Mina looked at the girl who became the love of her life. “I never thought I would be like this.” She chuckled because of how stupid it sounds. “A stupid girl when it comes to love.” Her gaze went back to her girlfriend. “I never thought I would sacrifice<em> everything</em> just for you. I don’t even know what I was thinking. I’m a smart person! I could survive on my own even if my dad is in the way of my dreams. I could do anything but when it comes to you…”</p><p>“…my world stops spinning.”</p><p>Mina tried to wipe away her tears but it was no use.</p><p>“I think I’m wasting my life every time I’m with you.” Mina thought she’s almost on the verge of breaking down.</p><p>Mina chuckled because she knew she couldn’t unlove someone even if it’s breaking her apart. “But the problem is, I would still choose you.” Mina admitted, pointing her finger at Nayeon. “I would still choose you over anything, over anyone!”</p><p>It was the loudest she had ever said to Nayeon. Mina didn’t care of how selfish she looked even if she knew she’s not the only one who was hurting.</p><p>“Even after all of this, I would still choose you…”</p><p>Mina tried not to broke down in front of Nayeon but she couldn’t.</p><p>“You’re the love of my life, Nayeon. But it’s killing me.”</p><p>For the first time, Nayeon spoke up. “You can’t take it anymore?”</p><p>Mina looked at her with watery eyes, staring at the girl she loved. “Loving you was the best decision I’ve ever made but now it just feels like it’s my greatest mistake.”</p><p>The younger girl almost choked in her own sobs.</p><p>“You were my world. I gave everything to you until there’s nothing left for me.”</p><p>Before, looking at Nayeon felt like home. But why was she looking at her as if she’s a drug she needed to stop craving?</p><p>Nayeon smiled but it didn’t reach her eyes. Still, she asked, “Am I bringing you down with me?”</p><p>Mina almost told her that she didn’t because she’s finding a reason to stay.</p><p>Even if it’s a lie.</p><p>But she promised herself that she would tell her everything.</p><p>So, Mina nodded.</p><p>Nayeon took a deep breathe before saying, “You can’t do this anymore?”</p><p>Instead of answering, Mina replied, “I’m tired of sacrificing my dreams just to help you achieve yours.”</p><p>“Will you be happy without me?”</p><p>Mina couldn't say anything because everything hurts like hell. The damage was too much and at the back of her mind, she knew they had no choice but to let go.</p><p>Nayeon didn’t wait for an answer.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>The pain stayed.</p><p>But the reason of the pain didn’t.</p><p> </p><p>-</p><p> </p><p>In every relationship, there comes a point when the damage is too much and no matter how good it once was, the memories can't sustain you.</p><p> </p><p>—anon</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>it should be a valentines gift but i was so busy ;-;</p><p>if you find something wrong in the fic, it is purely my mistake. you can leave a comment to help me improve more!</p><p>i would gladly appreciate it if you will leave comments/kudos. tell me what you think! thank you for spending your time reading and I hope you have a nice day!</p><p>if you want to talk about it on twitter, use #MinayeonAgainstTheWorld I’ll be lurking! :D<br/>twitter: @thetokyowriter<br/>tokyo xx</p></blockquote></div></div>
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